My boyfriend tells me that he’d never use the line “It’s not you. It’s
me.
” Why? He tells me he’d prefer “It’s not me. It’s you.” While I
smacked him upside the head for such a cheesy joke, I started to think.
There’s a painful truth in his words.

No one believes they are wrong or at fault. It’s really is the other
person who is wrong or at fault. Human beings are innately selfish and
egotistical creatures. We don’t like to think we’re wrong. But we like
to think of ourselves as altruistic creatures so we let the other
person down easy by saying “It’s not you. It’s me.” It’s bull.

If it was me, I’d sure as hell stay in a relationship if it was me. For
instance, if I believed I wasn’t ready for a relationship I’d stay with
my SO. Because I would believe I could make it work out. Because if I
truly wanted to be with my SO, I’d do everything in my power to be with
him.

If, on the other hand, I believed he was getting boring or annoying,
I’d let him go. In no way would I think “maybe I’m just really
irritable and I should learn to get over that. It’s really my fault
that my SO is annoying the living daylights outta me.” I’d dump that
sucker’s ass before his stupid idiosyncrasies make me want to rip my
hair out.

Don’t fool yourself into believing the “It’s not you. It’s me” line
when it’s given to you. It’s really you. But y’know what? Who needs a
coward like that who’s too afraid to tell you the real reason why he
doesn’t want to be with you?

***Warning: Too much information up ahead***

I woke up this morning with a blinding, crippling pain in my tummy. So I
decided to make my toilet my best friend. Damn lactose in milk, cheese
and cream. I wish I had a constantly steam of lactaid running through
my body.

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6 comments
  1. I have to be the one to say, in your second paragraph, I really believe I am the one at fault when trouble starts brewing in a relationship.  I always believe that I could do better, a factor on being hard on myself throughout the years.
    You asked me in your last comment what was bothering me for all this time in the log I just typed, and what I was ‘ranting’ about with my friend was the state I was in when I lost my relationship of 5 years.  How emotionally destroyed I was, and everything that came about during that time.  I look back at my logs at that time, and where I am now, I realize I’m a better person, and I didn’t realize that it was still there for all this time.
    Hope your stomach is feeling better though!

  2. EsCue said:

    never!!!! hahaha…i’m hoping it’ll grow to an appropriate length soon cuz i’m tired of wearing hats and head bands.
    what you say is very true. my bf and i are very competitive. we scream at each other constantly cuz he thinks he’s right and i think i’m right. most of the time i am right. hahaha. it’s annoying cuz most people are so pig-headed to admit any of their own faults! they don’t even want to admit that the other person has a valid point. nothing is ever solved with that kind of attitude. *ahem* my bf.

  3. Actually, that is true. I just never thought about it. I think I did use that line once to break up with someone… it didn’t work too well. but really, he was boring, doing the same thing all the time and we didn’t really go anywhere away from the mall. blah – he claimed that i broke his heart and yaddy yaddy yadda but after we broke up, he sent bad rumours and gossip about me and i was just thinking in my head.o0( psh! you never loved me… i should’ve dumped you sooner.) meh. but yeah… if i recall each time that i used that excuse, which was very rarely, it was because there was something with the guy. if it really was me, then i would try to change or compromise it. heehee…. you are right.
    hmmm… i wonder what would happen if you ever needed to breatfeed… would the milk inside you bother your whole anti-diary body? hahahha… but only a silly goose like me goes thinking like that. *hugs*

  4. I agree with you! Why sugar coat things, just tell the truth, “it’s not me, it’s you”
    I hope you feel better soon =)
    Anyway, about the book I’m reading, so far Jane Eyre is pretty good.. Mind you, I’ve only read about 200 pages.. That book is long!

  5. tak_604 said:

    Funny, I’ve never had anyone say that to me before (the “it’s me, and not you” line). It’s always pretty much a straight out you’re an **@$#$@#$ and that’s the end of this, lol….. Although I agree with you. If you’re going to break up with someone, don’t sugar coat it, or make it seem like it was something else. If you find the person you are seeing is becoming a boorish mammal, tell them that. It might actually even help them straighten themselves out… (that is, of course, based on our own view of how people should be, but that’s whole different barrel of bananas).

  6. It looks like you, me and, Sleeping Cutie were facing the same thing yesterday =)  My tummy wasn’t doin too well either after having that crappy hot pudding bubbletea.  Can’t really figure out whether I’m lactose intolerant or not, or whether I just have a weak tummy.
    As for that “it’s not you, it’s me” line I’ve never had it used on me nor have I used it.  You are right; it’s a line of a coward, but the again society seems to lack to tools or the ability to communicate their emotions honestly and openly.

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